Where I find Myself...

I often wonder what element makes a home so special. Is it really the place where you finally find yourself?

My husband and I thoughtfully chose not to live in one of those grand glamorous locations where you have to pay a price for so called “happening crowds”…where you actually have to pay for the polluted technology filled air and heavy traffic that does not let you reach home even if you are close enough to see your non open able window from the road!! Where marketers tell you, “Don’t go anywhere else. All you need is right at your doorstep!” 

I fail to understand why for most people,'home' is linked with a status symbol or some vague self-made explanation of lifestyle. In my opinion, we can have our own lifestyle independently, no matter where we stay. Life style is definitely not governed by your address or how much rent you pay. It refers to the unique way in which you choose to live, including your favourite things in your daily routine; keeping time for doing what you love.

Ideally, I like to live on a second floor so that I can see the tree tops from the windows. Anything higher than the fifth floor makes me lose the sense of place and I feel as if stuck in concrete!

To me, home spells 'escape to dreamland' to be in tune with myself. But which is that one secret hideaway from the busy ever running world outside that my home gives me? … something that takes me back to my carefree childhood days when I often used to hide on the window ledge next to our sun bathing cat?

The answer is where I am sitting right now. The place that gives my thoughts a chance to become words. It is this humble private terrace that the pent floor has gifted to us. It gives me something truly incomparable --- a quiet breezy deck that tells me, the whole sky is mine! From one curve of the horizon to the other sea side edge, the bright orange sunrise is mine, the romantic purple sunset is mine. The peaceful evening after a hard day of work is mine; the hope filled Friday morning spilling weekend stories is mine.  It is here that I weave future plans while my son rides his bike and my husband waters the plants. It is here that we light up the Diwali lamps sheltered from crazy winter winds.

From here, I wave a loving “bye” to my son’s school bus and say a little prayer. I watch the foggy mornings turn into crisp noons  and busy evenings turn into chilly black starry nights. I watch days go by and turn into weeks and then into years. Many milestones attained, I look back with a smile.

I would not exchange it for any posh upmarket address that in fact feels like a Rapunzel’s tower surrounded by a noisy concrete jungle. The people living there do not even know how their breaths and thoughts have gotten lazily imprisoned in the blinding bling of a fake fancy world. They think they are so close to the ocean, when in fact they are trying to stay afloat in a big pretentious aquarium, much away from tranquillity!

As the new year loiters around the corner, lost in silent contemplation, I know, it is on this terrace that I want to see 2014 turn into 2015. The lights are in place. The ‘paper flowers’ of the pink bougainvillea dance with the breeze. The wind chime tinkles. It is here that I discovered my “quiet Happiness”. It IS here that I will continue to find myself.