The Wind will Carry Us

This year hasn't really gone the way I had imagined at the beginning. But that's exactly why I have learnt some important lessons. Life is unpredictable. Change is constant. We can never really plan our life. “The Wind Will Carry Us”--- just like the Iranian movie I watched earlier this year.

Even though things took a different route, I am thankful for many turns that my life has taken. I am proud of the fact that I stood up for what I believe in yet again. I went back to myself and continued to believe in my abilities, even though my belief system was slightly shaken. My priorities have changed. I want to focus on refilling my cup.

Honestly, I found some answers to profound questions of life while I was running the 5km marathon! This time, not just my husband and my older son, but my younger son also zoomed ahead of me during our yearly winter marathon. I had decided to keep a slow and steady constant speed and not stop at all, just calmly finish the race at my own pace. And I did exactly that. Who would have thought that running a marathon could be a spiritual experience! But it can be, when one finds their own track, pace, mind frame and the wind on the correct side!

Aren't we all running this marathon of life! Our pace and our fellow runners keep changing, but the race continues. The race is to finish well and complete our responsibilities , not to come first!

In November when I lost my cat, Rumi it reminded me of everything I have lost thus far. But one extremely satisfying experience was when my husband and I actually found another neighbour’s lost cat! I watched the woman reunite with her cat and found inexplicable peace. She gave me a hug and told me she had not slept that night and I completely understood what that meant! Has there been a single night I have not thought of Rumi! Then I thought of the concepts of “absence” and “union” from the Rubaiyat of poet Rumi…750 years of absence, eight centuries of presence!

I received my first Royalty for my poetry book, Amaira the little woman. I cannot put a price on that! Its the feeling of finally calling myself a published poet!  I had one gold and one silver pendant made for my precious Rudraksha beads, from that money to make the event immortal, just like the picture of Rumi, my kohl-eyed kitty on the pages of my book, Amaira…

Around Christmas, one of our neighbours had invited us to decorate their tree. We made ‘plans’ for a Secret Santa and cake. Their older son was to visit them for Christmas. But little did anyone know, that life had already made some other plans for him…and their family. I say with a heavy heart, there was no party. Only prayers, moist memories…and a shocking realisation...What is the meaning of life after losing a loved one!

We dream of having the whole perfect cake to ourselves, to decorate it, have it and eat it too… But sometimes all we are left with are two little pieces to call our own. Even then, let's be grateful for what’s on our plate. Those two pieces are enough.

When we plan to watch the splendid meteor shower, all set and ready to go, just like the previous years, this time the sky suddenly seems completely cloudy. The moon is full. We cannot even see the moon, forget the meteor shower! Then what do we do? This is Life. We can just sit out on the terrace instead, with a cup of warm cocoa, because my most favourite wine is also finished! I say, it's okay. The wind will carry us…yet again…into another New Year!

:: The Wind Will Carry Us is a 1999 Iranian film written and directed by Abbas Kiarostami. The title is a reference to a poem written by the modern Iranian poet Forough Farrokhzad.::

Wings of Stone

Our flight most times
is weighed down, delayed,
by the emotional luggage
we carry on our shoulders.

The heavy black handbag
full of ‘what-if’ obsessions
and ‘just -in -case’ compulsions,
wants more than it needs…

Wings are spread wide open,
but why do they feel so heavy?
Like the elephant’s tusks,
well flaunted, yet defunct.

While I want to celebrate
life’s gifts and little wins,
It's the losses that stab
and keep holding me back.

Each year is a mixed bag - - -
of opposites, that sit together, chitchatting.
Hits that lift up to cloud nine;
Misses that bring us down to the earth.

In the end, the mind has gone
on a yearly tour
and returned,
to the exact same starting point.

For the one who loses his way in the morning,
but comes home by evening,
is not lost after all…
Just a year older, perhaps wiser!

:: Sutjeska Memorial, Bosnia & Herzegovina ::

We are ALL Responsible...but are we?

They just barged into the community garden one fine morning and cut down some trees, removed the grasses, and killed all the flower beds in the name of “refurbishment” and “general maintenance”...

The birds who had their nests in those trees have lost their eggs. They fly around trying to find a suitable place to rebuild. The cat who used to run around, climb trees, and jump in the grasses was stressed and confused. Where's the planter she pooped in? There’s just mud everywhere. What happened to the garden?

If someone murders a garden in the name of renovation, what happens to the entire ecosystem that thrives on it? Birds, cats, insects…who cares about them? It's high time we stop normalizing these urban activities in the name of “development”.

Who is responsible for all the lost animals and birds? All they care about are paint flakes, steel pipes and waterproofing membranes. What about the soil enriched with live insects? What about the planters with flowers , the butterflies flitting around them? What about the laughing doves, who stopped laughing? It's not funny! Someone destroyed the garden and people around it are expected to continue living “normally”??? The cats have left the compound. There are no more dancing shadows of the trees on pathways. No more ‘red carpet welcome’ of the Jatropha flowers. No more ‘frangipani fest’ of my most loved Plumeria trees. No more barefoot walks on the grass. No more yoga, hide-n seek or badminton in the garden. Everything has to pause till they finish all the work…My favourite almond tree with red leaves is no more. The bulbuls have lost their home. I tried to save the frangipani I planted two years ago into a large planter for it to be replanted later in the same spot after the repair works are done, with a hope that it will survive the next few months in this make-shift arrangement. Does anyone else care? Is this a maintenance contract or contract killing!

The other day I heard, a school trip had gone to the “zoo” where the seals clap their hands in front of a gang of giggling gadget-held school kids. They are taught to believe, this is all “normal”! Watching another “sea world” inside a big mall, they are told, is perfectly normal!!!

Is it “normal” for tourists to expect getting “snow” inside a mall in the desert? Since when is chopping down full grown trees to deal with waterproofing issues considered “normal”? Is this what “developed” nations look like? Let's discuss this “environmental issue” sitting inside a tall air conditioned glass tower. Let's invite delegates with their private helicopters and planes to throw some light on these “earth issues” Let's make a fancy summit for social media! Wow! One million “likes”! Problem is solved!

We are taught to believe we are privileged to live here? Ironically, we are the “ landscape architects” of such masterplans! I would definitely prefer living in a village to this kind of pseudo development! Cutting down large trees is not acceptable. Disturbing any garden environment should not be allowed. No wonder all the “Rumis” who loved the gardens so much are running away in search of greener pastures… but all they find are more and more concrete jungles and blinding bright lights!

We have to ask the question to those “Environment Protection Acts”, how come approvals are not required before mercilessly chopping off mature trees even in private developments? For every slaughtered tree, there should be two new ones planted. Isn't that the rule?

Does anyone take note of the disruption to flora and fauna? Who is responsible for broken bird nests and lost cats? We are all responsible…but are we really “responsible”?